吕国博士 | 说话如高手，沟通如艺术——掌握吸引人的技巧

在沟通中，真诚是最重要的品质。不玩虚假、不做作，以真实的心态与人沟通，能让对话者茅塞顿开。内心的想法会通过言语、肢体语言和表情传达出来，所以要敞开心扉，用最真实的一面与人交流。不仅要言行一致，更要注重行动。说话好听是一回事，行为更为重要。

In communication, sincerity is the most important quality. Not playing false, not being artificial, communicating with others with a genuine mindset can lead to enlightening conversations. Inner thoughts are conveyed through words, body language, and expressions, so it is important to open up and communicate with others using the most authentic self. It is not only about consistency in words and actions, but also about emphasizing actions. Speaking nicely is one thing, but actions are even more important.

心态篇：摆正心态，打造顺畅沟通基础

Mindset: Set the right mindset to build a smooth communication foundation

一视同仁，平等对待在沟通中，保持平等的心态对待每个角色是非常重要的。无论对方身份如何，都要保持平和、温和的心态。对待劳动者，要慈眉善目、平静温和；对待高官大人物，要不卑不亢，以高贵的心态交流。只有保持平等的心态，才能真正尊重对方，建立良好的沟通关系。

In communication, it is crucial to maintain an equal mindset towards every individual involved. Regardless of the other person’s status, it is important to approach them with calmness and kindness. When dealing with workers, one should be compassionate and gentle, while when interacting with high-ranking officials or important figures, one should maintain a dignified mindset. Only by maintaining an equal mindset can one truly respect others and establish a healthy communication relationship.

点到即止，留有余地高手在说话时，讲究点到即止，留有余地。一方面，不会长篇大论，给对话者留出思考的空间，这是对对方的尊重；另一方面，不会把话说满，因为世事无绝对，所有的事情都在发展变化，留有余地更加负责任。

Experts in communication understand the importance of being concise and leaving room for interpretation. On one hand, they avoid lengthy speeches, allowing the listener to have space for reflection. This demonstrates respect for the other person’s thoughts and opinions. On the other hand, they refrain from stating everything definitively, as circumstances are constantly evolving. By leaving room for interpretation, they take responsibility for acknowledging the dynamic nature of situations.

思维篇：走心走脑，优秀思维造就高手说话  

Mindset: Use your heart and brain, excellent thinking to make high-level speech

知识储备，言之有物高手说话不仅仅是口若悬河，更要有长年累月的学识积累作为支撑。知识的储备不是为了炫耀自己的多，而是为了让说出来的话言之有物，不偏不倚。储备知识，提前做功课，是高手说话的基本功。

When experts speak, it is not just about being eloquent, but also about having accumulated knowledge over the years to support their words. The purpose of knowledge is not to show off how much one knows, but rather to ensure that what is said is meaningful and unbiased. Building a reservoir of knowledge and doing the necessary research in advance are fundamental skills for effective communication by experts.

逻辑清晰，言简意赅清晰的逻辑可以让对话者更快地理解你的想法，提高沟通效率。一方面，要在说话中保持条理性，先说主干思想，再展开细节描述。高手的说话总是有条不紊，不是为了模仿领导，而是为了表达更清晰。另一方面，要在言辞上严谨，说出来的话经得起推敲，不会给人胡言乱语的感觉。

Clear logic can help the interlocutor to understand your thoughts more quickly and improve communication efficiency. On one hand, to maintain the organization in speech, state the main idea first, and then expand with detailed description. A skilled speaker always speaks in an orderly manner, not to imitate the leader, but to express ideas more clearly. On the other hand, to use precise language, the words spoken can stand up to scrutiny and do not give the impression of random babbling.

换位思维，理解对方在说话之前，先站在对方的角度思考，再使用合适的方式进行交流。这并不与“一视同仁”矛盾，反而是对对方真正尊重的表现。思考对方的目的和需求，采用对方能够接受的表达方式和词汇。能够用换位思维去说话、做事，是高手与普通人在思维方式上的分水岭。

技巧篇：度的把握，高手说话的关键  

速度适中，循序渐进语速的适中是高手说话的关键之一。不要过慢或过快，要循序渐进，让对话者能够听明白并乐意接受你的主张。音量适中，掌握场合根据不同的场合，合理控制音量。在私密的环境中，音量不宜过大，不要给对话者造成压迫感；在公开的场合，音量不要太小，要确保所有人都能听到你说的内容。适当幽默，轻松愉快适当的幽默感能够让说话的气氛变得轻松愉快。即使是严肃的场合，配合适度的幽默，能够拉近与对话者的距离，促进高效沟通。但幽默要适度，过分的幽默会喧宾夺主，影响表达目的。

表情肢体，增强表达适当的表情和肢体动作能够让表达更清晰、准确。在一些场合，表情和肢体动作更能调动听众的情绪，促进良好的交流与互动。 修辞运用，深入人心使用符合场景的修辞方式和词汇，能够让听众对你的话更加印象深刻。适当的修辞运用，能够提升说话的说服力。

实操篇：不同场景中的高手说话技巧  

对家人，温和真心面对家人，要用最温和、真心的方式与他们沟通，不要放肆地发脾气。对自己最亲近的人，更要注重温和的沟通方式。 对朋友，真实而不装对朋友说话要真实，不要装。不要以高人一等的姿态说话，而要用真实的语言，更能拉近与朋友的关系。对领导，简洁清晰对领导说话要言简意赅，清晰地表达自己的观点。在讲清楚事情之后，可以提供自己的分析和解决方案，让领导有更多选择。对平级，照顾面子对平级说话要照顾对方的面子，不要越过对方的专业领域指点别人的工作。要主动提供帮助，站在对方的角度考虑他可能需要什么样的帮助。对下属，平等尊重对下属说话要平等对待，不要摆架子。多表扬多鼓励，同时给予指导，让下属感受到你的尊重和关心。 对客户，建立关系对客户说话要先拉近关系，而不是急于推销业务。帮助解决问题，表达你能帮助他们解决问题的态度和信心，才能得到客户的接受。   言行一致，高手的表率高手说话的艺术不仅仅体现在当时的表现上，更重要的是说完话后的行动。做一个表里如一的人，一个言行一致的人，你也能成为一个高手。高手说话的艺术需要长期的锻炼和实践，但更重要的是要将说话与行动相结合，成为一个真正有影响力的人。